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The name is Eileen, 19 years old. 5’11 something, dark hair, useless brown eyes, I guess I was born to find out how to get through life with the littlest effort possible. I tend to have absolutely no luck in life (I never noticed that until I was told so (several times) anyway I seem to still not care though (but I do think a lot about happiness))

I like music, lots of music. I like my friends and I like going out but I also like being left alone. I like tea and clothes and hair dye and books and taking photos and running my fingers through my hair and festivals and old cities and happy families and trivial knowledge and philosophy and that i was able to tell jonny greenwood that i appreciate his music and people I can’t reach

I don’t like mobile phones and wasting time and the feeling of wet fingers on wood and marmite and driving (fast) and the city i live in and sleeping too long and writing bad poems and not being able to write music and clubs that are too crowded for my free dance deluxe and freezing and the taste of the first sip of whisky and people I can’t reach

I’ve been everywhere and I know everything and I’ve met everyone and I’ve heard everything and I’ve seen everything and I still want more and I still want it to last forever. If you don’t think I’m a total nutter by now you’re very welcome to chat me up


January 25th

ah, anyway. i don’t usually do gossip (i hope i think i know), but this time it’s really something i can’t talk to anyone about, so in order to ensure that i can keep my mouth shut i thought maybe i’d just talk about it on here..


i keep returning to tumblr cause i just love it soo much but unfortunately i just don’t always have the time to write and reblog stuff… i’m so sorry. for everyone who’s still here: i currently feel okay. things are going well. i found a job and i’ve started paying back the debt i’m in. still owe a shitload of money to B. though he says he doesn’t want most of it back.

me and B. are still a couple but i’m getting more and more annoyed by his friends. there’s this one girl he used to have a crush on that still twists him around her little finger. and there’s this other female friend of his that keeps telling him about her (naked) photo shoots. and then there’s his younger brother who keeps trying to get everyone’s attention by just being absolutely obnoxious. He’s a horrible poser, trying to seem as edgy as possible by telling everyone that he’s had such a terrible drug problem and that his girlfriend (allegedly) is a manic depressive which is why they fight so much but he LOVES HER SO MUCH (although he’s cheated on her twice or even more often), they fight each other on a night out until they’ve gotten EVERYONE’s attention just to make up a few moments later. they’re both just horribly crude and immature and i can’t stand being around them. hearing someone talk about depression and serious problems like that makes you really angry when you’ve had these problems yourself.

but i can’t say these things out loud because they’re friends of B.’s and its driving me mad.

October 21st